here is my story

... evenings dark  yellowish red sun penetrates my heart.
   
The cool dry bridges rubs my skin.
It chokes me and wakes me up from the deapest sleep  of siesta.
And I happen to feel nothing for a while.

Then slowly  I muster up courage to breath and dare to get out of my numbness and touch the deep  hole  i've in my chest  and that it would never fill  no matter what.

No matter I  get the fullfillment for a while or forever ,eternity  of time seems  inadequate.
Moments seem  fading away fast,

faster than I could gather up some ,

for the rest of my breath  to hold on. 

And then it takes the fullest of my efforts to come out of my missing and smile.